Pencils 'n' Crayons

Back on the Horse

2010-09-09T12:56:00.000-07:00

Since i left school i've had more time to work on my art, i've been slowly moving away from relying on pencils and have started to do everything digitally. I beleive my strength lies in colours, since it is coming the easiest and the fastest for me, more than peniclling and inking ever did.

Pharmacy Tech

2010-04-01T18:57:00.000-07:00

Has been kicking my ass, i haven't really done any art, ha ha! Here's some pics of me looking spiffy @ school. :3

Old Poems

2010-01-24T22:44:00.000-08:00

Old Poems:

I feel like a poison
a poison you wanna take
by the time you notice the effects
it's already too late.

you'll love me at first
you'll want me in so many ways-
but by the time you notice the effects
it's already too late.

I'm mislabelled, misplaced on the shelf-
i look harmless, a tasy palate
you won't realize i was a poison
until it's already too late.

Back From Korea

2010-01-08T04:51:00.000-08:00

It's hard to summarize so eloquently the experience in less than a paragraph, other than it was awesome.

I learned so much, but i feel that, coming home, i'm different.

It was so strange to read my post from before i left. It feels like an echo of my own voice.

kam sa ni da, Korea. I loved you <3

Korea!

2009-12-24T03:04:00.000-08:00

24 hours until i'm on a plane to Korea from my home in canada, and all i can think about is how hungry i am gonna be when i step off that plane. Eloquent, eh?

I'm at my parents, my mom helped my re-dye my hair blue before family pictures tommorow, i was up with her having a bit of whiskey as we wrapped presents and talked until 4 in the morning. Which is the time right now.

My minds are wandering to my forum community and my skype contacts. for about 8 months now, literally, near the time of a baby's fermentation (whee and i'm going to be a med field student.), and this si the first time in 8 months, i've been away for skype for more than a few hours.

Sad, right?

I read somewhere that people become too attached to the personalities behind a screen. I think that is so very true. Humans seek socialiaztion, it's part of our nature. When an immediate form is, less than well, immediate, with technology the way it is- the internet is a substitute.

But is it just another kind of meat, or is it a supplement?

In my opinion, i think it is a supplement. Some sci fi books describe a type of food you can eat like a pill, and the tech is so advanced you can survive on it for months, but it's no replacement for a decent meal.

I think that, emotionally, mentally, relationships online are like those sci fi supplement food pill things. You can subsist on them, but they're not quite as filling as the real deal.

I suppose i am blessed, i balance the two out.

Even more blessed are the, what i feel, rewards of establishing these relationships. People are endlessly fascinating creatures. You can have two of a type and they can still be original, like flowers, or snowflakes, or crystals.

though don't let some of my relationships online let you catch me calling them flowers, snowflakes, or crystals. Some of them would prefer to be related to anything sweaty and manly and chest-thumping-- i'm exaggerating at that point to tease. ;D

Yet it stands- people are endlessly fascinating.

I suppose the longest relationship i've had online is the one that i am going to korea to meet. i say -going to- but really, he paid for the ticket and is letting me shack up in his sanctuary. I know i blogged earlier about the tablet giving being the nicest thing anyone has ever done?

To date, the korea thing shines the brightest. A complete act of kindness, to get me to come to visit... it baffles me.

The tablet baffles me in the same way. i look at the other person with such gratefulness, and wonder.

Why do you feel i am worthy of this? is what i want to ask. Why? Why me?

Yet it would be rude, because when someone does something nice for you, and you make a big deal out of it, you just want to shake the person. just take it! just accept this!

i know because i'm usually in the giving position. lol

however, it ties back into why people are so fascinating. Just when i think i'm ready to sign the human race off, things happen. And not to just necessarily me, i hear of great acts of kindness.

It's the fuel i turn to most people who are, who have, seen the ugly of this world and been scarred by it, ruined, tainted, broken, and i project my love to them. I try to.

Is it naieve to trust someone? quite possibly.

But if you can't trust someone, who can you trust? Soon you start distrusting yourself.

The key to life, in my opinion, and a healthy heart, a healthy soul, a happy one, is accepting the pain and accepting the sadness, allowing yourself to cry and feel the pain, but to never close your eyes to anything. Never close your heart yo anything. Take the pain, with the good, the love, the colour, the joy, the music, the nature, the things that are just as close to you as suffering.

I suppose i'll wrap up my 4 in the morning philosophies with, anyone i've talked to about this trip, has said, "you're a fool." why do this? it's crazy, it's korea, and i've never met this guy except on the internet over skype.

I just say, because i do. Because i am. because i trust, and because i will live. sure, things can go horribly wrong, i'm not saying i haven't had nightmares, i have. all this week up tot his 24 hour period of time.

but you hear stories of guys who, at the time, has a risk, an oopurtunity, and didnt take it. people who played safe all the time.

the world is too sterile, and clinical. Kids nowadays who stay inside get sick more often compared tot he kid who eats boogers and goes outide and gets dirty. There's a reason.

anyways. seems i can't wrap up my brain, so i'll end it here.

i'm scared shitless, and i'm nervous,

but i still can't wait to get off that plan and go for pancakes with my buddy.

Curse! Curses it's a Curse! Stop Cursing!

2009-11-27T21:39:00.000-08:00

This is the first piece of art i did on my new shiny Mac after my PC crapped out. nwn shiny mac loooooves it.

Working On DT Entry

2009-11-13T00:27:00.000-08:00

All my projects have literally been put on hold until i finish the DT manga contest entry.

Here's what i got so far. It was really fun working on these pages. I loved coloring them!!

2009-09-24T11:47:00.000-07:00

Yay comic Coloring!

This is a shot of one of the bottom panels i'm doing for Drowtales' manga contest.

It's been a real Learning experience so far.

And i like how faster i've gotten since i got commisioned to do an animation. I did this panel in maybe 2 hours?

It might not be the fastest but i was really pleased, i could see my little XP bar crawl one step closer to ding as i did that panel.

This hasn't really gotten alot of attention but i am incredibly pleased with this face set. This is actualyl what triggered me coloring in the style i've been using, just look at how nice it looks! Much better than what i've been doing up tot his point, in my opinion.

And this was just awesomesauce to color. Yayyyy!! I lvoe the outfits, and i lveo the pose.

Anyway that's enought tooting my own horn for a day.

LARP

2009-09-06T11:36:00.000-07:00

My first larp was awesome. I was pulled away to be an NPC, a sort of hydra head. It was awesome.

Then, because i was late and got all turned around with jeff, we had to make my character while the game was going on. It was fine, I basically am playing an 'iredeemable' (super bad) Sloth angel, and am crazy. I can suggest things to people when they sleep and other crazy powers liek that, but basically i'm like the crazy evil witch, or the evil river tam of the group.

I started a blog about my character,t hinking since she's BRAND NEW to the world and everything, (not just gnereally, we made her green as grass), i could take a comedic spin on what she's learning and the like.

heres the other blog, strictly just for my character.

http://kcdane.blogspot.com/

New Tablet

2009-08-21T01:32:00.000-07:00

The generosity of people astounds me, you hear about it on the news, but, i dont know, have you ever had someone do something so randomly awesome for you ever?

a new, shiny white tablet.

for free.

for me.

....

this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me, ever. I dont think ryan dika knows how much i appreciate his generosity.

it's like...

i've been so broke. I owe money to everyone- have credit people after me and everything. my computer has been broken- so i've had no access to my fiels or my music of my drawing programs like photoshop.

when i broke up with jeff i returned the tablet. It was just the thing to do.

and while i love how i've gotten in touch with my traditional art, i miss doing animation and being able to color digitally.

being able to color.... adding life to my drawings...

beng able to do art again the way i used to, not having to worry about money or buying a new tablet.

i've missed it so much, but i've put it off,t hinking, i wont be able to do it for awhile.

now i can. now i can color again.

thank you ryan, for bringing color back to me.

Happier thoughts, hee hee

2009-05-13T19:52:00.000-07:00

:D

i'm doing good on my pages so far, and eating macaroni currently. :3

I just thought i'd post some happier thoughts since the last two have been complainy.

Getting Impatient

2009-04-27T22:41:00.001-07:00

I've been struggling with my diagnosis. I don't really beleive i'm so messed up i need 'intense therapy' or being used a guinea pig at the u of a psychology department. I don't really beleive i need the medicine anymore, and i don't really feel like i need to keep relying on the government for money.

I guess what sparked this post today is the new song by metric. It really hit home, it feels like they're talking about me. I guess that's silly, but sometimes you hear a verse come through the radio and you're like, 'wow. yeah...'

anyways... i'm tired of relying on government money. I want to get money so i can go back to school, because i'm angry and am impatient. Fuck therapy. Fuck everything i've been doing for the past few months. I want a job and i want an education.

Is there an equilibrium between the real world and me?

2009-04-15T23:31:00.000-07:00

Comic book work is getting more and more detail orientated for me. But i've been worrying about the economic crisis and my dream to go to vancouver.

The news that 800 students got laid off really worried me, and so i've put off going for another few years, losing the money i've already put into it with a guarantee by word that somehow my money wil still be there if i ever deicde to re-apply. which sounds like bogus but w/e...

anywyas so i've been looking at upgrading academically, and trying to find a niche in the world of smart people i like. So far i've come up with herpetology/zoology/biology, and a bachelor of arts.

Truth be told i'd just really like to keep drawing...

Animation

2009-03-09T00:48:00.000-07:00

Well, all the way into 12 seconds of animation, finished. with a hell of a lot of raw. But it's coming along great! The faerie girl got turned into my introduction part, where, i originally was just using her as the only-viewable-at-1200% part. you know, a background movement, nothing else.

But i couldn't help it. I found myself making up this story of her and her people and what her favourite food was and yeah, just ended up getting bigger. So, not wanting to abuse my muse i went with the flow.

and let me tell you, it is working out great! can't show you yet. top secret. but here's a screenshot.

2009-02-24T13:25:00.000-08:00

Here it is colored, I spent all day (literally) coloring it. I'll go through it one more time tommorow, and start working on a traditional piece of art for my portfolio.

then of course i really need to get my ass in gear for the animation. having less than 30 seconds after 3 months is sad.

Portfolio Work

2009-02-23T17:08:00.000-08:00

I think i finally drew a good portfolio piece. This one is not actually one picture, but two pictures i digitally edited and smashed together.

It had to be done that way becaus eof all the detail i put into the bacground, which, was lost due to the people in the front.

From right to left is, Omeega the draenei shaman, Galfet the gnome mage, Zichelle the human mage, Dolfhammer the human paladin, and Lomon the human priest. (who's getting tanked by the look of it.)

Coloring it is going to possibly be a two day process.

Comic Art - Zombie Girl

2009-02-22T22:47:00.001-08:00

So far, Zombie Girl hasn't cause much problems since i've had this project on the back burner. The colorist is very relaxed, as am i, about getting pages done. And we keep on a regular contact basis so, if we don't hear from each other for a few days, we're not wondering if the project's flopped.

Page one was awesome to draw, It was my first time incorporating straight lines to a wild background, since, my animation project has kept me pretty loose and has encouraged minimal usage of perspective.

It was refreshing, and now that i'm working on a guild piece, i've gotten back into the swing of it.